- Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.
- He was as tall as a 6′3″ tree.
- Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
- From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
- John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
- She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
- The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
- He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
- Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
- She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
- The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife’s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
- The lamp just sat there, like an inanimate object.
- McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
- His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
- He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at asolar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
- Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
- Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
- The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.
- Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
- The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
- They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth.
- He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.
- Even in his last years, Grand pappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it hadrusted shut.
- He felt like he was being hunted down like a dog, in a place that hunts dogs, I suppose.
- She was as easy as the TV Guide crossword.
- She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
- The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
- The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
- “Oh, Jason, take me!” she panted, her breasts heaving like a college freshman on $1-a-beer night.
- It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
- It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
- He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
- The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.
- Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
- Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like “Second Tall Man.”
- The thunder was ominous-sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
- The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
- She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.
- Her pants fit her like a glove, well, maybe more like a mitten, actually.
- Fishing is like waiting for something that does not happen very often.
- They were as good friends as the people on “Friends.”
- Oooo, he smells bad, she thought, as bad as Calvin Klein’s Obsession would smell if it were called Enema and was made from spoiled Spamburgers instead of natural floral fragrances.
- The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Tex.) in her first several points of parliamentary procedure made to Rep. Henry Hyde (R-Ill.) in the House Judiciary Committee hearings on the impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton.
- He was as bald as one of the Three Stooges, either Curly or Larry, you know, the one who goes woo woo woo.
- The sardines were packed as tight as the coach section of a 747.
- Her eyes were shining like two marbles that someone dropped in mucus and then held up to catch the light.
- The baseball player stepped out of the box and spit like a fountain statue of a Greek god that scratches itself a lot and spits brown, rusty tobacco water and refuses to sign autographs for all the little Greek kids unless they pay him lots of drachmas.
- I felt a nameless dread. Well, there probably is a long German name for it, like Geschpooklichkeit or something, but I don’t speak German. Anyway, it’s a dread that nobody knows the name for, like those little square plastic gizmos that close your bread bags. I don’t know the name for those either.
- She was as unhappy as when someone puts your cake out in the rain, and all the sweet green icing flows down and then you lose the recipe, and on top of that you can’t sing worth a damn.
- Her artistic sense was exquisitely refined, like someone who can tell butter from I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter.
- It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before.
- Bob was as perplexed as a hacker who means to access T:flw.quid55328.com\aaakk/ch@ung but gets T:\flw.quidaaakk/ch@ung by mistake.
- You know how in “Rocky” he prepares for the fight by punching sides of raw beef? Well, yesterday it was as cold as that meat locker he was in.
- The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fan set on medium.
- Her lips were red and full, like tubes of blood drawn by an inattentive phlebotomist.
- The sunset displayed rich, spectacular hues like a .jpeg file at 10 percent cyan, 10 percent magenta, 60 percent yellow and 10 percent black.
Thursday, December 01, 2011
Bad analogies in the Washington Post
An oldie but goodie from the Washington Post. The best worst analogies ever!
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Privilege 101
If you pay any attention at all to the news, you've probably seen plenty of footage from the Occupy Movement. Or perhaps something about higher education. Or something about marriage. Race? Probably, check. More likely than not, you've heard the word "privilege" tossed around.
I recently found one of the best essays explaining privilege that I've ever read. On a blog. Here's the post. Read it and think. Dare you to engage someone and have a little tete-a-tete about privilege.
I recently found one of the best essays explaining privilege that I've ever read. On a blog. Here's the post. Read it and think. Dare you to engage someone and have a little tete-a-tete about privilege.
Wednesday, July 06, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
Response to Amy Chua's Article in WSJ
Just in case you all haven't had a chance to read "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior", here's the link:
The woman gives new life to the term Hard-Ass Asian Parent through her own accounts of her parenting style. She weakly prefaces her discussion of the "Chinese Mother" and subsequent parenting style with the following:
"I'm using the term "Chinese mother" loosely. I know some Korean, Indian, Jamaican, Irish and Ghanaian parents who qualify too. Conversely, I know some mothers of Chinese heritage, almost always born in the West, who are not Chinese mothers, by choice or otherwise. I'm also using the term "Western parents" loosely. Western parents come in all varieties.
All the same, even when Western parents think they're being strict, they usually don't come close to being Chinese mothers. For example, my Western friends who consider themselves strict make their children practice their instruments 30 minutes every day. An hour at most. For a Chinese mother, the first hour is the easy part. It's hours two and three that get tough."
So even the Western mothers that are considered "strict" evidently do not have the endurance to be a Chinese Mother. Nor do they have the guts to go the extra step to shame their children into obedience.
In another part of the article, Chua mentions that her father used to call her "garbage" when she was disrespectful - a tactic she says she used on her own daughter, in English and at a dinner party. Lovely. Had I been in that position (and I have been in similar situations), I would simply pocket that horrible memory, only to have it re-surface in a very self-destructive way.
This then brings up the point that many people have reacted to this article - including blogs such 8Asians and Racialicious - and brought up the fact that Asian Americans are more likely than those of any other racial group to fall into depression, attempt suicide, and resort to the multitude of self-destructive behaviors and disorders.
Chua claims that the article was a mishmash of different excerpts from her book, which she is currently schilling - Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. Of course the editors at the WSJ did not consult her about the edits or the article title and of course they would choose some controversial sections! I'll take that statement as fair, since during my amateur dabblings in writing for my University's newspaper, it would be rare that I would be consulted for edits in my column or stories for the news section during the production process.
However, this anecdote is no better:
"My kids were maybe seven and four and my husband had forgotten my birthday so at the last minute we went to this mediocre Italian restaurant and he said “O.K., girls you both have a little surprise for mommy.” And my daughter Lulu pulls out a card, but the card was just a piece of paper folded crookedly in half with a big smiley face and it said Happy Birthday Mom. And I looked at it and I gave it back and I said 'This isn’t good enough. I want something that you put a little bit more time into.” So I rejected her birthday card. People can’t believe I rejected this handmade card. But she knew as well as I did that it took her about two seconds to do it. That’s the story that’s coming off as the most outrageous, which in our family is like a standing joke.
Clearly, I'm not in on the joke because I don't find it funny... Again, if I were in that situation, I would undoubted cry myself dehydrated and then some from the shame. I wonder if Chua's daughters will really turn out to be as happy as Chua claims herself to be.
And on another note, this is strike two for me personally from the esteemed Wall Street Journal. Perhaps the WSJ has it out for Asians/Culture, or for publicizing Chinese/Asian parenting in the most awful ways possible. Making the model minorities scary..again? The editors and the publication earned strike two with the 2005 article "The New White Flight", which insinuates that Asians and aspects of Asian culture, that promote extreme to impossible pressures on youth to academic success, is driving Caucasians out of Silicon Valley. My own high school was named as one of the sites that the writer cites as evidence to her thesis.
No bueno, WSJ, no bueno.
The woman gives new life to the term Hard-Ass Asian Parent through her own accounts of her parenting style. She weakly prefaces her discussion of the "Chinese Mother" and subsequent parenting style with the following:
"I'm using the term "Chinese mother" loosely. I know some Korean, Indian, Jamaican, Irish and Ghanaian parents who qualify too. Conversely, I know some mothers of Chinese heritage, almost always born in the West, who are not Chinese mothers, by choice or otherwise. I'm also using the term "Western parents" loosely. Western parents come in all varieties.
All the same, even when Western parents think they're being strict, they usually don't come close to being Chinese mothers. For example, my Western friends who consider themselves strict make their children practice their instruments 30 minutes every day. An hour at most. For a Chinese mother, the first hour is the easy part. It's hours two and three that get tough."
So even the Western mothers that are considered "strict" evidently do not have the endurance to be a Chinese Mother. Nor do they have the guts to go the extra step to shame their children into obedience.
In another part of the article, Chua mentions that her father used to call her "garbage" when she was disrespectful - a tactic she says she used on her own daughter, in English and at a dinner party. Lovely. Had I been in that position (and I have been in similar situations), I would simply pocket that horrible memory, only to have it re-surface in a very self-destructive way.
This then brings up the point that many people have reacted to this article - including blogs such 8Asians and Racialicious - and brought up the fact that Asian Americans are more likely than those of any other racial group to fall into depression, attempt suicide, and resort to the multitude of self-destructive behaviors and disorders.
Chua claims that the article was a mishmash of different excerpts from her book, which she is currently schilling - Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. Of course the editors at the WSJ did not consult her about the edits or the article title and of course they would choose some controversial sections! I'll take that statement as fair, since during my amateur dabblings in writing for my University's newspaper, it would be rare that I would be consulted for edits in my column or stories for the news section during the production process.
However, this anecdote is no better:
"My kids were maybe seven and four and my husband had forgotten my birthday so at the last minute we went to this mediocre Italian restaurant and he said “O.K., girls you both have a little surprise for mommy.” And my daughter Lulu pulls out a card, but the card was just a piece of paper folded crookedly in half with a big smiley face and it said Happy Birthday Mom. And I looked at it and I gave it back and I said 'This isn’t good enough. I want something that you put a little bit more time into.” So I rejected her birthday card. People can’t believe I rejected this handmade card. But she knew as well as I did that it took her about two seconds to do it. That’s the story that’s coming off as the most outrageous, which in our family is like a standing joke.
Clearly, I'm not in on the joke because I don't find it funny... Again, if I were in that situation, I would undoubted cry myself dehydrated and then some from the shame. I wonder if Chua's daughters will really turn out to be as happy as Chua claims herself to be.
And on another note, this is strike two for me personally from the esteemed Wall Street Journal. Perhaps the WSJ has it out for Asians/Culture, or for publicizing Chinese/Asian parenting in the most awful ways possible. Making the model minorities scary..again? The editors and the publication earned strike two with the 2005 article "The New White Flight", which insinuates that Asians and aspects of Asian culture, that promote extreme to impossible pressures on youth to academic success, is driving Caucasians out of Silicon Valley. My own high school was named as one of the sites that the writer cites as evidence to her thesis.
No bueno, WSJ, no bueno.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Shout out to Santa Clara County
As an addendum to my previous post...
If you happen to be registered to vote in Santa Clara County, then please take some time to look at the candidates for the Santa Clara County Board of Education.
I'm going to take a bit of time to plug Dr. Michael Chang, professor at De Anza College and Director and Founder of the Asian Pacific American Leadership Institute. I recommend taking a good look at his candidate profile:
http://www.smartvoter.org/2010/11/02/ca/scl/vote/chang_m/
Dr. Chang is an inspiration in many ways. His achievements and contributions to the Cupertino/Bay Area community have been significant, and even more so when one considers the fact that he is a first generation Asian American. (Asian Americans tend to have lower levels of voter turnout than other racial groups, despite having higher average incomes and level of educational attainment.) As an educator and activist he has done a great deal to educate young people on the importance of civic engagement, particularly for Asian Americans. With APALI, Dr. Chang has successfully created an ever-growing network of people that that want to be engaged with the community in a variety of capacities - particularly with politics.
And to wrap things up nicely, here's Beau Sia telling you to vote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptbZ0hvbIC4
If you happen to be registered to vote in Santa Clara County, then please take some time to look at the candidates for the Santa Clara County Board of Education.
I'm going to take a bit of time to plug Dr. Michael Chang, professor at De Anza College and Director and Founder of the Asian Pacific American Leadership Institute. I recommend taking a good look at his candidate profile:
http://www.smartvoter.org/2010/11/02/ca/scl/vote/chang_m/
Dr. Chang is an inspiration in many ways. His achievements and contributions to the Cupertino/Bay Area community have been significant, and even more so when one considers the fact that he is a first generation Asian American. (Asian Americans tend to have lower levels of voter turnout than other racial groups, despite having higher average incomes and level of educational attainment.) As an educator and activist he has done a great deal to educate young people on the importance of civic engagement, particularly for Asian Americans. With APALI, Dr. Chang has successfully created an ever-growing network of people that that want to be engaged with the community in a variety of capacities - particularly with politics.
And to wrap things up nicely, here's Beau Sia telling you to vote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptbZ0hvbIC4
Election Time
It's that time of year again! November 2nd is fast approaching and now is the crunch time for everyone that is campaigning.
Absentee voters need to get their ballots in!
It always strikes me that while people seem to stay so on top of the latest shenanigans of the cast of Jersey Shore or the latest outrageous outfit that Lady Gaga wore, they tend to be remarkably uninformed about what is going on politically around them. The voter turnout seems to reflect that.
Maybe it's just me, but it shouldn't be too hard to look up the Propositions on the ballot, or listen to snippets and/or read transcripts of the debates of the candidates for various seats in the different tiers of local and state government.
Take some time and do some reading! 20 minutes to an hour is all it takes. That's either one episode of Big Bang Theory
Here's a list of the Propositions:
http://www.voterguide.sos.ca.gov/propositions/
Office candidates:
http://www.voterguide.sos.ca.gov/candidates/statements/
P.S. Saying that your vote doesn't matter is a terrible excuse to not vote. Though it is true that a single vote does not have a huge impact on the outcome. However, in aggregate it certainly is significant. It is unbelievable the number of people that try to use this same excuse as the reason why they don't bother to vote. Why would you disregard such a great privilege anyhow? So many different minorities country in this country have had to fight tirelessly to obtain the privilege to have their needs be met and represented politically. Please don't do a disservice to the activists that fought to provide you with the right to vote, and certainly not to the communities that you are a part of. Voting is a basic civic duty, so get on it!
P.P.S. If you don't vote, you effectively relinquish your right to complain about the election outcome and whatever subsequently that you do not like.
Absentee voters need to get their ballots in!
It always strikes me that while people seem to stay so on top of the latest shenanigans of the cast of Jersey Shore or the latest outrageous outfit that Lady Gaga wore, they tend to be remarkably uninformed about what is going on politically around them. The voter turnout seems to reflect that.
Maybe it's just me, but it shouldn't be too hard to look up the Propositions on the ballot, or listen to snippets and/or read transcripts of the debates of the candidates for various seats in the different tiers of local and state government.
Take some time and do some reading! 20 minutes to an hour is all it takes. That's either one episode of Big Bang Theory
Here's a list of the Propositions:
http://www.voterguide.sos.ca.gov/propositions/
Office candidates:
http://www.voterguide.sos.ca.gov/candidates/statements/
P.S. Saying that your vote doesn't matter is a terrible excuse to not vote. Though it is true that a single vote does not have a huge impact on the outcome. However, in aggregate it certainly is significant. It is unbelievable the number of people that try to use this same excuse as the reason why they don't bother to vote. Why would you disregard such a great privilege anyhow? So many different minorities country in this country have had to fight tirelessly to obtain the privilege to have their needs be met and represented politically. Please don't do a disservice to the activists that fought to provide you with the right to vote, and certainly not to the communities that you are a part of. Voting is a basic civic duty, so get on it!
P.P.S. If you don't vote, you effectively relinquish your right to complain about the election outcome and whatever subsequently that you do not like.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Regrets?
A very lovely person in my life shared the following link to a blog post titled "Regrets of the Dying".
I think it is noteworthy that some regrets are not only for the dying.
I wonder if the living have more regrets, particularly at the various crossroads in a lifetime. Since the beginnings of my quarter-life crisis (perhaps I am over-dramatizing this period of transition), I have certainly regretted letting go of certain friendships, not making the right decisions that would have made me happy, etc.
Biggest regrets right now:
1. Not doing the things that make me happy
2. Not letting those that I love just how much they mean to me often enough
3. Not taking my time in college
4. Not being more considerate of others
5. Not taking enough risks
All "nots", but hopefully I can change more of that. I wonder what everyone else regrets in the moment, not just at the verge of death.
I think it is noteworthy that some regrets are not only for the dying.
I wonder if the living have more regrets, particularly at the various crossroads in a lifetime. Since the beginnings of my quarter-life crisis (perhaps I am over-dramatizing this period of transition), I have certainly regretted letting go of certain friendships, not making the right decisions that would have made me happy, etc.
Biggest regrets right now:
1. Not doing the things that make me happy
2. Not letting those that I love just how much they mean to me often enough
3. Not taking my time in college
4. Not being more considerate of others
5. Not taking enough risks
All "nots", but hopefully I can change more of that. I wonder what everyone else regrets in the moment, not just at the verge of death.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Thoughts on racism
Read this:
http://www.8asians.com/2010/08/18/chinese-fire-drill-thoughts-on-racism/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+8Asians+%288+Asians%29
I think it's fascinating to have these kinds of reflections on racism and being "Asian" from the perspective of Lani Valapone Cox, who is part Thai and sometimes referred to as "American". Her so-called American-ness is a lot more mutable because her being "American" is seemingly belied by her perceived foreign-ness - the fact that she looks "Asian". Just what kind of "Asian" depends on who is looking at/evaluating her.
I've also thought that in a lot of ways, it is just that much harder for people of multiple ethnicities to find some sort of foothold on a culture. In her post, Lani refers to a moment where she finds herself at a part, positioned between a number of Thai women, and a group of Caucasian women. She judges both.
As much as I sometimes loathe the term "Asian" - because of the way it make it seem as though my actual ethnicity is barely worth nothing-, I find myself falling into the trap of referring to not only myself but others as "Asian". I too, am guilty of using this simple, all-encompassing term to the point of abuse. I, too, am guilty of cracking jokes about Asian stereotypes that ultimately must damn me and those that "Asian".
http://www.8asians.com/2010/08/18/chinese-fire-drill-thoughts-on-racism/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+8Asians+%288+Asians%29
I think it's fascinating to have these kinds of reflections on racism and being "Asian" from the perspective of Lani Valapone Cox, who is part Thai and sometimes referred to as "American". Her so-called American-ness is a lot more mutable because her being "American" is seemingly belied by her perceived foreign-ness - the fact that she looks "Asian". Just what kind of "Asian" depends on who is looking at/evaluating her.
I've also thought that in a lot of ways, it is just that much harder for people of multiple ethnicities to find some sort of foothold on a culture. In her post, Lani refers to a moment where she finds herself at a part, positioned between a number of Thai women, and a group of Caucasian women. She judges both.
As much as I sometimes loathe the term "Asian" - because of the way it make it seem as though my actual ethnicity is barely worth nothing-, I find myself falling into the trap of referring to not only myself but others as "Asian". I too, am guilty of using this simple, all-encompassing term to the point of abuse. I, too, am guilty of cracking jokes about Asian stereotypes that ultimately must damn me and those that "Asian".
Monday, August 02, 2010
On the band wagon again..maybe
I haven't been a very good blogger for the entire time I've had this one here. I think I was much better at this in middle school and high school, back in the day when Xanga was the shit and MySpace became the place where a person could give her (his) face and person found online relevance & significance. I would write anything, and spew out frustrations and the littlest joys for anyone to see on the internet, with little regard for personal privacy and safety.
Anyhow... I just want to say that I plan on posting more on this. Books, thoughts and ideas.
Anyhow... I just want to say that I plan on posting more on this. Books, thoughts and ideas.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
New year, new post (belated as usual)
Since the beginning of the new year, I've made a few promises to myself. Not resolutions, but promises. Goals. All to make me a better person and all that. It is especially important now for me to figure out how to be a real person in the real world now that I am done with my undergraduate career.
My goals:
1. Figure out how to exist outside the ivory tower of academia.
2. Read (shouldn't be too hard)
3. Run a few races. This looks like a half-marathon year.
4. Be good to myself.
5. Be good.
So far #2 is working out great. I've re-read a few books, including Beloved. I still wonder what that "hot thing" that Beloved keeps repeating in her stream-of-consciousness narrative toward the end is. Is it love? Is it the pain? Is it desire?
I've also read this past week: Lose Your Mother, Stone Butch Blues, and Push. It would appear that I am on some quest to make myself cry with my reading list. Beloved certainly wasn't laugh riot of a re-read.
These books led me to think a lot about the concept of "home". What is home? What/who/where makes a home? This is what I think "home" is:
1. A place
2. Imagined
3. Occupies space
4. Self
5. Love
6. People (family and community, which blurr together, since family doesn't have to mean blood)
7. Warmth
8. Acceptance
9. Memory
10. Safe
11. Favorites
12. Experience
13. Relation
14. Rest
15. Where "otherness" doesn't exist.
Am I missing anything?
Currently working on Jhumpa Lahiri's collection Unaccustomed Earth.
My goals:
1. Figure out how to exist outside the ivory tower of academia.
2. Read (shouldn't be too hard)
3. Run a few races. This looks like a half-marathon year.
4. Be good to myself.
5. Be good.
So far #2 is working out great. I've re-read a few books, including Beloved. I still wonder what that "hot thing" that Beloved keeps repeating in her stream-of-consciousness narrative toward the end is. Is it love? Is it the pain? Is it desire?
I've also read this past week: Lose Your Mother, Stone Butch Blues, and Push. It would appear that I am on some quest to make myself cry with my reading list. Beloved certainly wasn't laugh riot of a re-read.
These books led me to think a lot about the concept of "home". What is home? What/who/where makes a home? This is what I think "home" is:
1. A place
2. Imagined
3. Occupies space
4. Self
5. Love
6. People (family and community, which blurr together, since family doesn't have to mean blood)
7. Warmth
8. Acceptance
9. Memory
10. Safe
11. Favorites
12. Experience
13. Relation
14. Rest
15. Where "otherness" doesn't exist.
Am I missing anything?
Currently working on Jhumpa Lahiri's collection Unaccustomed Earth.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
From SD,CA
I am a liar.
From the moment I wake up I feel like the day is a performance. It's a bad performance because I crack.
I'm not ok.
I hate questioning.
From the moment I wake up I feel like the day is a performance. It's a bad performance because I crack.
I'm not ok.
I hate questioning.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Greetings from Buffalo!
I am having a blast at this conference, though I have skipped a good half of it unintentionally. I am half on PST and half on EST, which means that I go to bed around 2-3am EST (which is 11-12 PST) and wake up around 6:30am EST (3:30am PST). I am not a napper, and yet I am most definitely conking out around 2pm for several hours everyday since Wednesday. I am not used to this!
I have also been missing out simply because I have midterms next week, and I am not attending lecture because I need to study so I physically can't/shouldn't be participating which makes me super anxious about my grades and I have to complete some extra credit so that I do not fail a couple of courses or at least get an unacceptable-to-my-"Asian"-standards (which are really just MY standards anyway, but I use "Asian" to deflect ownership of certain really high expectations and oh! look what I've done to this sentence).
Run-on sentences can be so much fun to read aloud. Though grammatically incorrect, there is just something so fabulous about breaking the rules and simply saying exactly how you mean straight from the brain. No filters, isn't that nice.
I can't ever pass on the opportunity to buy a book, or even several. This is the primary reason for my being poor once I am financially cut off from my parents. There's a book fair at the conference, where many of the participants are selling some of their work. Of course I had to buy a couple - Half Life & The Melancholy of Anatomy. Both works are by Shelley Jackson, who's sensationalized by her textual experiment "Skin". I attended her reading a few nights ago. She makes me want pink hair and bangs. And a tattoo that's assigned by her. I want that experience of complicating my identity by someone's claim of ownership of creating me. Does that make sense? Life is just one big cacophony of experiments.
Of course I should choose Shelley Jackson's texts as my next literary adventure. She writes treatments of the body and the possibilities of the body. I presented a critical analysis of a textual body to postulate the reading of the physical body. My entire panel addressed the theme of the body and bodily experiences. The body is so damned interesting.
After my panel on Thursday, the women in my panel and I went to grab a drink at a bar, and we proceeded to discuss pastimes, pornography, Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia pets, and terrible conference humor. One very interesting observation that one woman made was "I never know what I really look like. It's different in every mirror. It's rather disconcerting to not know what you really look like." This prompted some hilarious musings over whether or not pulling out an eyeball to be a true gazer would work or not, given the lack of depth perception and gruesome vision of an eyeless socket and blood running down the face, and that this would make a fabulous Halloween costume. (What a sentence THAT was.)
Anyhow, this did make me think that it is true that I do not know what my face really looks like. It is disconcerting to not be fully aware of what it is that I own as part of me. That, and that I am subject to any other person's gaze without one of my own. I realized that I cannot do what Astrid does at one point in White Oleander, which was draw her own face so many times that she had memorized every line, curve, and plane. I cannot do that. I can position myself in front of a mirror with a pad and pencil (charcoal, actually, is my preferred medium) and never really know what I look like from one glance to the next.
I have also been missing out simply because I have midterms next week, and I am not attending lecture because I need to study so I physically can't/shouldn't be participating which makes me super anxious about my grades and I have to complete some extra credit so that I do not fail a couple of courses or at least get an unacceptable-to-my-"Asian"-standards (which are really just MY standards anyway, but I use "Asian" to deflect ownership of certain really high expectations and oh! look what I've done to this sentence).
Run-on sentences can be so much fun to read aloud. Though grammatically incorrect, there is just something so fabulous about breaking the rules and simply saying exactly how you mean straight from the brain. No filters, isn't that nice.
I can't ever pass on the opportunity to buy a book, or even several. This is the primary reason for my being poor once I am financially cut off from my parents. There's a book fair at the conference, where many of the participants are selling some of their work. Of course I had to buy a couple - Half Life & The Melancholy of Anatomy. Both works are by Shelley Jackson, who's sensationalized by her textual experiment "Skin". I attended her reading a few nights ago. She makes me want pink hair and bangs. And a tattoo that's assigned by her. I want that experience of complicating my identity by someone's claim of ownership of creating me. Does that make sense? Life is just one big cacophony of experiments.
Of course I should choose Shelley Jackson's texts as my next literary adventure. She writes treatments of the body and the possibilities of the body. I presented a critical analysis of a textual body to postulate the reading of the physical body. My entire panel addressed the theme of the body and bodily experiences. The body is so damned interesting.
After my panel on Thursday, the women in my panel and I went to grab a drink at a bar, and we proceeded to discuss pastimes, pornography, Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia pets, and terrible conference humor. One very interesting observation that one woman made was "I never know what I really look like. It's different in every mirror. It's rather disconcerting to not know what you really look like." This prompted some hilarious musings over whether or not pulling out an eyeball to be a true gazer would work or not, given the lack of depth perception and gruesome vision of an eyeless socket and blood running down the face, and that this would make a fabulous Halloween costume. (What a sentence THAT was.)
Anyhow, this did make me think that it is true that I do not know what my face really looks like. It is disconcerting to not be fully aware of what it is that I own as part of me. That, and that I am subject to any other person's gaze without one of my own. I realized that I cannot do what Astrid does at one point in White Oleander, which was draw her own face so many times that she had memorized every line, curve, and plane. I cannot do that. I can position myself in front of a mirror with a pad and pencil (charcoal, actually, is my preferred medium) and never really know what I look like from one glance to the next.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
New Opportunities . . . I think
This is 2 week-old news:
I will be presenting a paper on Bhanu Kapil's text Incubation: A Space for Monsters at the &NOW Conference of Innovative Writing and the Literary Arts in October at Buffalo, New York. The conference is hosted by the University at Buffalo, SUNY.
My paper discusses the ways in which Kapil's work is a hybrid of a many different genres, which defies easy categorization, which I believe is for the better.
I will be presenting a paper on Bhanu Kapil's text Incubation: A Space for Monsters at the &NOW Conference of Innovative Writing and the Literary Arts in October at Buffalo, New York. The conference is hosted by the University at Buffalo, SUNY.
My paper discusses the ways in which Kapil's work is a hybrid of a many different genres, which defies easy categorization, which I believe is for the better.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Happy Anniversary
I developed a serious case of what I called my "quarter-life crisis" a few months into my 20th year. Now I'm at approximately the 1 year anniversary of this phenomenon. To celebrate this past year of Carpe Diem-ing, I thought that now would be a good time to revisit the list of things that I've accomplished in this whirlwind year:
1. Committed myself to and ran a half-marathon.
2. Got a tattoo
3. Got my ear cartilage pierced
4. Wrote 76 pages of a manuscript that I do not intend on publishing. Overall, a very good foray into creative writing; it was definitely a nice change of pace from expository writing all the time.
5. Emailed Bhanu Kapil and was pleasantly surprised to find that she wrote back.
6. Got another tattoo
7. Roadtrip to Vegas (mostly as a driver)
8. Committed myself to and ran a full marathon (the day after a fairly bad car accident). Makes one appreciate being alive
9. Submitted a proposal to read a paper of mine at the &NOW Conference of Innovative Writing and Literary Arts. It was accepted and I am officially on my way to present my work at my first-ever literary conference (both as a presenter and as an attendee).
10. Really worked on engaging and immersing myself in new media forms for the purpose of primarily networking.
Right now I'm reading Jhumpa Lahiri's work The Interpreter of Maladies. It is a beautiful collection of short stories that in reveal the private aches and longings of various South Asian transplanted individuals. Though there are a number of comical moments in the various stories, they are woven into an overarching melancholic tone of narrative. Lahiri's book-turned-movie, The Namesake, was the first work I read, and I now see that it follows the same privately felt melancholy of its predecessors in The Interpreter of Maladies.
I recently finished The Satanic Verses, the controversial work that brought upon Salman Rushdie the fatwa. Overall, I enjoyed the fragmented and convoluted narrative(s) that break(s) down traditional views of mythology and creates new ones.
More to come later . . .
1. Committed myself to and ran a half-marathon.
2. Got a tattoo
3. Got my ear cartilage pierced
4. Wrote 76 pages of a manuscript that I do not intend on publishing. Overall, a very good foray into creative writing; it was definitely a nice change of pace from expository writing all the time.
5. Emailed Bhanu Kapil and was pleasantly surprised to find that she wrote back.
6. Got another tattoo
7. Roadtrip to Vegas (mostly as a driver)
8. Committed myself to and ran a full marathon (the day after a fairly bad car accident). Makes one appreciate being alive
9. Submitted a proposal to read a paper of mine at the &NOW Conference of Innovative Writing and Literary Arts. It was accepted and I am officially on my way to present my work at my first-ever literary conference (both as a presenter and as an attendee).
10. Really worked on engaging and immersing myself in new media forms for the purpose of primarily networking.
Right now I'm reading Jhumpa Lahiri's work The Interpreter of Maladies. It is a beautiful collection of short stories that in reveal the private aches and longings of various South Asian transplanted individuals. Though there are a number of comical moments in the various stories, they are woven into an overarching melancholic tone of narrative. Lahiri's book-turned-movie, The Namesake, was the first work I read, and I now see that it follows the same privately felt melancholy of its predecessors in The Interpreter of Maladies.
I recently finished The Satanic Verses, the controversial work that brought upon Salman Rushdie the fatwa. Overall, I enjoyed the fragmented and convoluted narrative(s) that break(s) down traditional views of mythology and creates new ones.
More to come later . . .
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Humble Pie
My dad told me many times during the past year: Don't ever go so far as to think that you're too good for anything.
Especially now.
Especially now.
Monday, March 09, 2009
To do
Fun and not so fun things on THE LIST:
1. GRE Literature Subject Exam test prep. IT'S COMING IN ABOUT 3 WEEKS. KILL ME KILL ME NOW. I'm scared, but eh, such is life.
2. Article due Thursday, meaning Wednesday night. Will I make it?
3. CD launch party on Wednesday night! (this means I need to GET MY SHIT DONE)
4. Final paper for one of my classes due on Thursday
5. re-reading Watchmen for the 4th time. BRILLIANT. I wanted to re-read it after watching the movie, which I thought was pretty effing cool.
6. re-reading The Balcony, The Crucible, some literary criticism, etc. lots of review but of good stuff.
7. Philosophy in the Bedroom. Marquis de Sade is so much fun! oh sex and philosophy, unbelievable combination, particularly for an 18th century Frenchman. The correlation between a person's view of the mechanics of society and view of sex is absolutely amazing.
8. Reviewing the anthologies
9. Finals prep
10. Enjoy the company of some truly wonderful people.
No-no List:
1. People who don't understand "no"
2. Alcohol as a crutch and then an explanation
3. Non-confrontational and passive-agressive
4. Not cleaning up messes within 48 hours, max
5. Taking advantage of others' benevolence
6. Inconveniences to larger groups of people
7. Severe back pain
8. Not being able to drink caffeine for 5 days
9. Pure, unsweetened cranberry juice. So gross and it makes me pucker like the world will end.
10. Extremely inappropriate behavior and not being sorry for it when it affects others
Oh Yes! List:
1. Venting. is. beautiful. Makes me less of a crazy person
2. Good food with excellent company
3. Learning to enjoy staying in bed
4. Unearthing the steroid cream for my eczema after thinking that I lost it in Wa DC.
5. My pillow
6. Extraordinary Desserts. They're extraordinary.
7. Rooibus Chai from Teavana
8. Blogging. It's part of my venting process, so always a good thing.
9. Apples to Apples. One of the best games ever ever EVER
10. Talking to my sister about Watchmen and being really excited.
Friday night was not my favorite night. Sunday was one of my favorites.
1. GRE Literature Subject Exam test prep. IT'S COMING IN ABOUT 3 WEEKS. KILL ME KILL ME NOW. I'm scared, but eh, such is life.
2. Article due Thursday, meaning Wednesday night. Will I make it?
3. CD launch party on Wednesday night! (this means I need to GET MY SHIT DONE)
4. Final paper for one of my classes due on Thursday
5. re-reading Watchmen for the 4th time. BRILLIANT. I wanted to re-read it after watching the movie, which I thought was pretty effing cool.
6. re-reading The Balcony, The Crucible, some literary criticism, etc. lots of review but of good stuff.
7. Philosophy in the Bedroom. Marquis de Sade is so much fun! oh sex and philosophy, unbelievable combination, particularly for an 18th century Frenchman. The correlation between a person's view of the mechanics of society and view of sex is absolutely amazing.
8. Reviewing the anthologies
9. Finals prep
10. Enjoy the company of some truly wonderful people.
No-no List:
1. People who don't understand "no"
2. Alcohol as a crutch and then an explanation
3. Non-confrontational and passive-agressive
4. Not cleaning up messes within 48 hours, max
5. Taking advantage of others' benevolence
6. Inconveniences to larger groups of people
7. Severe back pain
8. Not being able to drink caffeine for 5 days
9. Pure, unsweetened cranberry juice. So gross and it makes me pucker like the world will end.
10. Extremely inappropriate behavior and not being sorry for it when it affects others
Oh Yes! List:
1. Venting. is. beautiful. Makes me less of a crazy person
2. Good food with excellent company
3. Learning to enjoy staying in bed
4. Unearthing the steroid cream for my eczema after thinking that I lost it in Wa DC.
5. My pillow
6. Extraordinary Desserts. They're extraordinary.
7. Rooibus Chai from Teavana
8. Blogging. It's part of my venting process, so always a good thing.
9. Apples to Apples. One of the best games ever ever EVER
10. Talking to my sister about Watchmen and being really excited.
Friday night was not my favorite night. Sunday was one of my favorites.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
It's essay time, or NOT
I'm taking a class on the 18th century French and German Enlightenment this quarter with a pretty amazing professor. I have to say that it has taken about seven weeks for me to find material that I find astoundingly interesting or entertaining to read. I've read Kant's "What is Enlightenment" several times, Voltaire's Candide a couple of times, and Rousseau's First and Second Discourses once before- I'm a little over those texts. I'm easily bored with material that I don't dig.
But NOW the class is on The Sorrows of Young Werther by Goethe. It is HILARIOUS and remarkably well-written. It is such a little novel - closer to a novella - and still so well-developed. My professor remarked on how advanced the 18th century was in terms of exploring psychology (only the term "psychology" wasn't coined and used until later). Goethe is extraordinarily perceptive to the human nature and behaviors.
When I first read The Sorrows of Young Werther, I was actually repulsed by Werther's pretty writing and flowery effusiveness. He's such a passionate and deluded young man, I couldn't help disliking him. I thought his fixation on the object of his affection (Lotte) was too over-the-top to be taken seriously. This is where it's very helpful to take into context Goethe's background and the character he's created: a bourgeois young man from 18th-century Germany. Hooray for bourgeois men of letters and feelings. The work isn't lengthy at all, but offers beautiful insight into the mind of young Werther and his delusions regarding class, gender, and relationships.
Highlights of the week/end:
1. Sean Penn winning Best Actor and Dustin Lance Black winning Best Original Screenplay - both for Milk [= Their speeches were pretty amazing as well.
2. White cheddar cheez-its and vanilla coke zero and Red Hot Chili Peppers while writing
3. Reading various blogs to avoid writing essays (I'll pay for this later, I know it)
4. Elixir flavored 5 gum. It's the berry one!
5. Pomegranate Burt's Bees chapstick . . . it's much better smelling than the original I think. Whatever, it'll be lost within the next week, I just know it
6. ESPRESSO. shit this stuff is strong. I had forgotten, silly of me
7. Successful interviews with the University's young alumni! [= networking is an amazing thing.
8. Cocktail party and seeing everyone dressed up, even though being dressed up as a girl involves fun for like 15 minutes MAX before the discomfort sets in and results in a fierce burning desire to rip off the tights and stilettos and poorly-insulating dress. Guys have it good. Beauty is a pain.
9. In-class discussions about the nature of delusion in relationships and how it plays into fear of intimacy [= AND porn is no good for real intimacy, people! Not everyone can have pornstar-monstrous-boobs-and-penises-outrageous sex. This should come as no big surprise to the people who watch that stuff anyway; they're fucking themselves and not the sex god/dess on the screen.
10. Google books is a beautiful thing, period
11. Realizing that nearly everything major I do is writing-and/or-reading-oriented: my job with the the campus newspaper, my job with the alumni association (I write reports), my major, this blog, my actual journal.
12. ALMOST DONE WITH THE L WORD. I only have 3 episodes left to watch of Season 2 and I'll have watched all of the show. Well . . . minus the two episodes left to this final season. ]=
13. Danny Green is excellent with Brazilian/Latin jazz piano. Check him out at www.dannygreen.net He graduated from UC San Diego in 2004 and was recently signed onto the Pacific Coast Jazz label. Yay for up-and-coming talent getting recognized!
14. Rediscovering much loved songs
15. Good news at home or at least good news anywhere my family is. Things are looking up? I hope hope hope. Finger's crossed, stick a needle in my eye and all that stuff.
But NOW the class is on The Sorrows of Young Werther by Goethe. It is HILARIOUS and remarkably well-written. It is such a little novel - closer to a novella - and still so well-developed. My professor remarked on how advanced the 18th century was in terms of exploring psychology (only the term "psychology" wasn't coined and used until later). Goethe is extraordinarily perceptive to the human nature and behaviors.
When I first read The Sorrows of Young Werther, I was actually repulsed by Werther's pretty writing and flowery effusiveness. He's such a passionate and deluded young man, I couldn't help disliking him. I thought his fixation on the object of his affection (Lotte) was too over-the-top to be taken seriously. This is where it's very helpful to take into context Goethe's background and the character he's created: a bourgeois young man from 18th-century Germany. Hooray for bourgeois men of letters and feelings. The work isn't lengthy at all, but offers beautiful insight into the mind of young Werther and his delusions regarding class, gender, and relationships.
Highlights of the week/end:
1. Sean Penn winning Best Actor and Dustin Lance Black winning Best Original Screenplay - both for Milk [= Their speeches were pretty amazing as well.
2. White cheddar cheez-its and vanilla coke zero and Red Hot Chili Peppers while writing
3. Reading various blogs to avoid writing essays (I'll pay for this later, I know it)
4. Elixir flavored 5 gum. It's the berry one!
5. Pomegranate Burt's Bees chapstick . . . it's much better smelling than the original I think. Whatever, it'll be lost within the next week, I just know it
6. ESPRESSO. shit this stuff is strong. I had forgotten, silly of me
7. Successful interviews with the University's young alumni! [= networking is an amazing thing.
8. Cocktail party and seeing everyone dressed up, even though being dressed up as a girl involves fun for like 15 minutes MAX before the discomfort sets in and results in a fierce burning desire to rip off the tights and stilettos and poorly-insulating dress. Guys have it good. Beauty is a pain.
9. In-class discussions about the nature of delusion in relationships and how it plays into fear of intimacy [= AND porn is no good for real intimacy, people! Not everyone can have pornstar-monstrous-boobs-and-penises-outrageous sex. This should come as no big surprise to the people who watch that stuff anyway; they're fucking themselves and not the sex god/dess on the screen.
10. Google books is a beautiful thing, period
11. Realizing that nearly everything major I do is writing-and/or-reading-oriented: my job with the the campus newspaper, my job with the alumni association (I write reports), my major, this blog, my actual journal.
12. ALMOST DONE WITH THE L WORD. I only have 3 episodes left to watch of Season 2 and I'll have watched all of the show. Well . . . minus the two episodes left to this final season. ]=
13. Danny Green is excellent with Brazilian/Latin jazz piano. Check him out at www.dannygreen.net He graduated from UC San Diego in 2004 and was recently signed onto the Pacific Coast Jazz label. Yay for up-and-coming talent getting recognized!
14. Rediscovering much loved songs
15. Good news at home or at least good news anywhere my family is. Things are looking up? I hope hope hope. Finger's crossed, stick a needle in my eye and all that stuff.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
FML
Things I've been addicted to:
1. Reading those damn "25 things about me" notes on Facebook. I like reading those things; many things about my friends amuse me. However, I absolutely refuse to post one of those notes because it just seems awkward for me to post stuff for ANY one to read, even if I just tag the people that are near and dear to my heart. Creepers. I fear them. Hypocritical, I know.
2. fmylife.com <- this site is hilarious. This past week has been crazy, and this site + failblog.org make me feel better, among some other things and some people.
3. articles from feministing.com ; there was a post this past week with a picture of two very happy looking people wearing tshirts that said "ex-masturbator". apparently there's a group that makes a whole line of these kinds of tshirts - "ex-diva", "ex-hypocrite", "ex-atheist", etc. My favorite? "ex-fornicator", hands down. To anyone who has that shirt, I'd just love to ask, "So when did sex stop being fun?"
4. Really rich hot chocolate. I'm pro at making this stuff from scatch. Not the milk or the chocolate, but the hot chocolate. No powdered stuff for me!
5. The L Word. I. Love. This. Show. I found a site where I can watch all the episodes and I'm so addicted it's not even funny. And I have a crush on Shane. And maybe Bette. But definitely Shane.
Complications:
1. Family - the usual and the not so usual.
2. Still feeling burnt out from last quarter.
3. Feeling hopelessly frustrated writing sometimes and sometimes all the time.
4. Experiencing feelings/emotions that scare me.
5. I keep eating nuts and sometimes stuff with eggs and even mushrooms even though I'm supposed to stay away. And then I develop rashes that bug the shit out of me. Damn.
I ran to the place where books are stacked glass
Reflecting the marbled sky
-Cornflower blue peeping from behind
Unbleached spun sugar cotton- Freedom!
I took a turn and headed for the canyon.
As I descended I was met with a vision of flaming orange yellow,
Lightly veiled by the descending curtain of tears from the clouds above,
Blessing the hills with a last glorious touch.
I wished I could fly to that distant horizon,
Succeeding where Icarus failed.
But I had not even his courage - fearing the impossible heights and the impossible fall-
And ran, half drowned in regret, back to my four-walled prison
1. Reading those damn "25 things about me" notes on Facebook. I like reading those things; many things about my friends amuse me. However, I absolutely refuse to post one of those notes because it just seems awkward for me to post stuff for ANY one to read, even if I just tag the people that are near and dear to my heart. Creepers. I fear them. Hypocritical, I know.
2. fmylife.com <- this site is hilarious. This past week has been crazy, and this site + failblog.org make me feel better, among some other things and some people.
3. articles from feministing.com ; there was a post this past week with a picture of two very happy looking people wearing tshirts that said "ex-masturbator". apparently there's a group that makes a whole line of these kinds of tshirts - "ex-diva", "ex-hypocrite", "ex-atheist", etc. My favorite? "ex-fornicator", hands down. To anyone who has that shirt, I'd just love to ask, "So when did sex stop being fun?"
4. Really rich hot chocolate. I'm pro at making this stuff from scatch. Not the milk or the chocolate, but the hot chocolate. No powdered stuff for me!
5. The L Word. I. Love. This. Show. I found a site where I can watch all the episodes and I'm so addicted it's not even funny. And I have a crush on Shane. And maybe Bette. But definitely Shane.
Complications:
1. Family - the usual and the not so usual.
2. Still feeling burnt out from last quarter.
3. Feeling hopelessly frustrated writing sometimes and sometimes all the time.
4. Experiencing feelings/emotions that scare me.
5. I keep eating nuts and sometimes stuff with eggs and even mushrooms even though I'm supposed to stay away. And then I develop rashes that bug the shit out of me. Damn.
I ran to the place where books are stacked glass
Reflecting the marbled sky
-Cornflower blue peeping from behind
Unbleached spun sugar cotton- Freedom!
I took a turn and headed for the canyon.
As I descended I was met with a vision of flaming orange yellow,
Lightly veiled by the descending curtain of tears from the clouds above,
Blessing the hills with a last glorious touch.
I wished I could fly to that distant horizon,
Succeeding where Icarus failed.
But I had not even his courage - fearing the impossible heights and the impossible fall-
And ran, half drowned in regret, back to my four-walled prison
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
New Year's Hit List
Before I dive into my list of things to do this year, allow me to update my vacation reading...
I FINALLY read Story of the Eye by Georges Bataille. I had absolutely no idea of what it is about. Turns out its basically about the sexual explorations and violations by adolescents. Its great and liberating, like all things that don't obey rules, and the writing is lovely despite its incredibly graphic content. But there's some pretty kinky sex in this book and I can't say that I'm particularly a fan of that stuff for myself. Also not a fan of rape. But I'm infinitely less offended by the word "cunt". Not recommended for those that are easily offended, though it'd be great to decolonize some minds.
I'm still in the middle of The Shock Doctrine by Naomi Klein. Lovely stuff, but long and depressing. I am harboring a growing grudge against capitalism and aggressive, manifest-destiny-like nature.
I'm also not done yet with Bitch: In Praise of Difficult Women by Elizabeth Wurtzel. I love Wurtzel's worship of bad, and fabulously interesting women. I can identify with so much of what this woman writes! I recommend it for anyone. Really. It's not just for feminists.
A doctor's visit this morning informed me that my eczema situation has gotten progressively worse and now I should avoid the following things:
1. seafood
2. bamboo
3. mushrooms
4. eggs
5. nuts
6. jewelry that is less than 14k gold
7. all lotions aside from aveeno, cetaphil and sarna
8. all soaps aside from aveeno, cetaphil and dial
9. stress, if possible
10. sleep deprivation, if possible
Maybe I should just be vegan. Oh but the CHEESE!! and it's difficult enough already when eating out. ]=
Looking back on 2008, there were so many good memories. Here are the highlights:
1. Running a half-marathon
2. Writing pages and pages of word vomit all summer. To be edited next summer.
3. My first tattoo
4. Getting a cartilage piercing
5. Visiting the Steinbeck Center and his house in Salinas
6. Taking Anna Joy Springer's Contemporary Feminist Literature class
7. Crossfading for the first time and then writing while still in my altered state. Really cool weird stuff came out
8. Reading tons of Beat Generation stuff: Curso's poems, Ginsberg's poems, Kerouac's poems and books, and Burroughs' books.
9. My column
10. Seeing and hearing Melody Gardot live
11. Spontaneous and even reckless decisions that I don't regret at all
12. Interning for APALI
13. Essay grading parties
14. My second tattoo
15. Making fabulous new friends
16. My Crackberry
17. Rachael Yamagata's new cd.
18. Calling and emailing Bhanu Kapil and her actually writing back to me
19. Discovering City Lights Bookstore and visiting the Beat Museum
20. Protesting Prop 8 in Hillcrest (multiple times) and on campus.
OKOK time for my New Year's Hit List (I don't believe in resolutions, they don't work):
1. Go Sky-Diving
2. Figure out how to be Zen
3. Read more (all) of David Sedaris' Stuff
4. Learn all I can about experimental writing during the summer. Try it out too
5. Get a drastically different hairstyle and love it
6. Learn all I can about Carolyn Cassady, wife of Neal Cassady and friend of Allen Ginsberg and sometimes lover of Jack Kerouac
7. Run my first marathon in 4:15 or less
8. Find a muse
9. Edit last summer's writing
10. Write more weird poems
11. Heal a few relationships that have fallen apart this past year
12. Visit the place where Neal Cassady used to live in Los Gatos. The house was demolished in 1997 and the Monte Sereno community was completely unaware of its historical value. Sad. 18231 Bancroft Ave. Maybe I'll visit it the day before I leave for San Diego.
13. Enjoy the Presidential Inauguration. What an experience! 17 days until I'm in DC for the spectacle
14. Practice and learn more italian on my own.
15. Listen to more Italian music
16. Do well on my GRE exams. I'm particularly worried about the Subject Exam for Literature in English. Fabulous.
17. Try decorating the walls of my room. My ugly pink walls. The only saving grace of the room is the fact that it basically a miniature library.
18. Find and visit more dead author's houses
19. Work on the graduate school plans (applications)
20. Enjoy being 21 (in April)
It's going to be a good year.
I FINALLY read Story of the Eye by Georges Bataille. I had absolutely no idea of what it is about. Turns out its basically about the sexual explorations and violations by adolescents. Its great and liberating, like all things that don't obey rules, and the writing is lovely despite its incredibly graphic content. But there's some pretty kinky sex in this book and I can't say that I'm particularly a fan of that stuff for myself. Also not a fan of rape. But I'm infinitely less offended by the word "cunt". Not recommended for those that are easily offended, though it'd be great to decolonize some minds.
I'm still in the middle of The Shock Doctrine by Naomi Klein. Lovely stuff, but long and depressing. I am harboring a growing grudge against capitalism and aggressive, manifest-destiny-like nature.
I'm also not done yet with Bitch: In Praise of Difficult Women by Elizabeth Wurtzel. I love Wurtzel's worship of bad, and fabulously interesting women. I can identify with so much of what this woman writes! I recommend it for anyone. Really. It's not just for feminists.
A doctor's visit this morning informed me that my eczema situation has gotten progressively worse and now I should avoid the following things:
1. seafood
2. bamboo
3. mushrooms
4. eggs
5. nuts
6. jewelry that is less than 14k gold
7. all lotions aside from aveeno, cetaphil and sarna
8. all soaps aside from aveeno, cetaphil and dial
9. stress, if possible
10. sleep deprivation, if possible
Maybe I should just be vegan. Oh but the CHEESE!! and it's difficult enough already when eating out. ]=
Looking back on 2008, there were so many good memories. Here are the highlights:
1. Running a half-marathon
2. Writing pages and pages of word vomit all summer. To be edited next summer.
3. My first tattoo
4. Getting a cartilage piercing
5. Visiting the Steinbeck Center and his house in Salinas
6. Taking Anna Joy Springer's Contemporary Feminist Literature class
7. Crossfading for the first time and then writing while still in my altered state. Really cool weird stuff came out
8. Reading tons of Beat Generation stuff: Curso's poems, Ginsberg's poems, Kerouac's poems and books, and Burroughs' books.
9. My column
10. Seeing and hearing Melody Gardot live
11. Spontaneous and even reckless decisions that I don't regret at all
12. Interning for APALI
13. Essay grading parties
14. My second tattoo
15. Making fabulous new friends
16. My Crackberry
17. Rachael Yamagata's new cd.
18. Calling and emailing Bhanu Kapil and her actually writing back to me
19. Discovering City Lights Bookstore and visiting the Beat Museum
20. Protesting Prop 8 in Hillcrest (multiple times) and on campus.
OKOK time for my New Year's Hit List (I don't believe in resolutions, they don't work):
1. Go Sky-Diving
2. Figure out how to be Zen
3. Read more (all) of David Sedaris' Stuff
4. Learn all I can about experimental writing during the summer. Try it out too
5. Get a drastically different hairstyle and love it
6. Learn all I can about Carolyn Cassady, wife of Neal Cassady and friend of Allen Ginsberg and sometimes lover of Jack Kerouac
7. Run my first marathon in 4:15 or less
8. Find a muse
9. Edit last summer's writing
10. Write more weird poems
11. Heal a few relationships that have fallen apart this past year
12. Visit the place where Neal Cassady used to live in Los Gatos. The house was demolished in 1997 and the Monte Sereno community was completely unaware of its historical value. Sad. 18231 Bancroft Ave. Maybe I'll visit it the day before I leave for San Diego.
13. Enjoy the Presidential Inauguration. What an experience! 17 days until I'm in DC for the spectacle
14. Practice and learn more italian on my own.
15. Listen to more Italian music
16. Do well on my GRE exams. I'm particularly worried about the Subject Exam for Literature in English. Fabulous.
17. Try decorating the walls of my room. My ugly pink walls. The only saving grace of the room is the fact that it basically a miniature library.
18. Find and visit more dead author's houses
19. Work on the graduate school plans (applications)
20. Enjoy being 21 (in April)
It's going to be a good year.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Vacation = Me time
post-finals week:
1. sleep like a bear. sleeping more than 4 hours a night?! unheard of! feels good though
2. too much free time that i squander online when im not out socializing
3. cold. very cold. freezing up north. whopping 42 degrees in the sun in the middle of the day. by my aversion for the cold (though it gets much much colder in other places), one would think i'm cold-blooded. no wonder i chose a socal college.
4. worried about my grades. as usual. get a grip. nerd.
5. meeting up with friends and characters
6. odd discussions with my parents
7. freaking out about future plans yet again
8. pondering over whether or not to get that tattoo
9. strange desire to pierce my eyebrow
10. longer runs
i've read two books so far:
Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. Not my favorite. I enjoyed Blink and The Tipping Point a good deal more. I feel as though Gladwell's quest to break down simplistic acceptance of the existence of "outliers" (aka incredible success stories) is marred by the fact that he provides another formula that simplifies success as the perfect cocktail of opportunities, family dynamics/ideals, cultural backgrounds, and the like - though this formula does require a significantly greater amount of thinking and analysis of the outlier's situation. While he makes quite a few good points, Gladwell also falls into the sad little trap of stereotyping, or reaffirming certain stereotypes about certain racial/ethnic groups. Mr. Gladwell, not all Asians are Chinese/Korean/Japanese, thank you. Overall, an entertaining read. Makes you think a little bit, or a lot. But still not enough.
Mildred Pierce by James M. Cain. I've been introduced to another fantastic villainness! I love the really sick mother-daughter relationship in this book. I watched the movie adaptation of the novel just a little over a month ago and it really was quite entertaining and fascinating . . . I quickly learned to hate Veda, Mildred's daughter. Anyway, the book version is quite different, but Mildred's unrelenting quest to please her insatiable daughter is roughly the same, even magnified in the novel. Daughters are cruel, I will say that much.
Next on the list is Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris. I've been told to read David Sedaris' stuff for ages now, I just haven't really done so. There is always too much to read. Well, I'm finally getting around to it, and I am really very excited.
1. sleep like a bear. sleeping more than 4 hours a night?! unheard of! feels good though
2. too much free time that i squander online when im not out socializing
3. cold. very cold. freezing up north. whopping 42 degrees in the sun in the middle of the day. by my aversion for the cold (though it gets much much colder in other places), one would think i'm cold-blooded. no wonder i chose a socal college.
4. worried about my grades. as usual. get a grip. nerd.
5. meeting up with friends and characters
6. odd discussions with my parents
7. freaking out about future plans yet again
8. pondering over whether or not to get that tattoo
9. strange desire to pierce my eyebrow
10. longer runs
i've read two books so far:
Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. Not my favorite. I enjoyed Blink and The Tipping Point a good deal more. I feel as though Gladwell's quest to break down simplistic acceptance of the existence of "outliers" (aka incredible success stories) is marred by the fact that he provides another formula that simplifies success as the perfect cocktail of opportunities, family dynamics/ideals, cultural backgrounds, and the like - though this formula does require a significantly greater amount of thinking and analysis of the outlier's situation. While he makes quite a few good points, Gladwell also falls into the sad little trap of stereotyping, or reaffirming certain stereotypes about certain racial/ethnic groups. Mr. Gladwell, not all Asians are Chinese/Korean/Japanese, thank you. Overall, an entertaining read. Makes you think a little bit, or a lot. But still not enough.
Mildred Pierce by James M. Cain. I've been introduced to another fantastic villainness! I love the really sick mother-daughter relationship in this book. I watched the movie adaptation of the novel just a little over a month ago and it really was quite entertaining and fascinating . . . I quickly learned to hate Veda, Mildred's daughter. Anyway, the book version is quite different, but Mildred's unrelenting quest to please her insatiable daughter is roughly the same, even magnified in the novel. Daughters are cruel, I will say that much.
Next on the list is Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris. I've been told to read David Sedaris' stuff for ages now, I just haven't really done so. There is always too much to read. Well, I'm finally getting around to it, and I am really very excited.
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