Regrets?

A very lovely person in my life shared the following link to a blog post titled "Regrets of the Dying".



I think it is noteworthy that some regrets are not only for the dying.
I wonder if the living have more regrets, particularly at the various crossroads in a lifetime. Since the beginnings of my quarter-life crisis (perhaps I am over-dramatizing this period of transition), I have certainly regretted letting go of certain friendships, not making the right decisions that would have made me happy, etc.

Biggest regrets right now:
1. Not doing the things that make me happy
2. Not letting those that I love just how much they mean to me often enough
3. Not taking my time in college
4. Not being more considerate of others
5. Not taking enough risks

All "nots", but hopefully I can change more of that. I wonder what everyone else regrets in the moment, not just at the verge of death.

Thoughts on racism

Read this:
http://www.8asians.com/2010/08/18/chinese-fire-drill-thoughts-on-racism/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+8Asians+%288+Asians%29

I think it's fascinating to have these kinds of reflections on racism and being "Asian" from the perspective of Lani Valapone Cox, who is part Thai and sometimes referred to as "American". Her so-called American-ness is a lot more mutable because her being "American" is seemingly belied by her perceived foreign-ness - the fact that she looks "Asian". Just what kind of "Asian" depends on who is looking at/evaluating her.

I've also thought that in a lot of ways, it is just that much harder for people of multiple ethnicities to find some sort of foothold on a culture. In her post, Lani refers to a moment where she finds herself at a part, positioned between a number of Thai women, and a group of Caucasian women. She judges both.

As much as I sometimes loathe the term "Asian" - because of the way it make it seem as though my actual ethnicity is barely worth nothing-, I find myself falling into the trap of referring to not only myself but others as "Asian". I too, am guilty of using this simple, all-encompassing term to the point of abuse. I, too, am guilty of cracking jokes about Asian stereotypes that ultimately must damn me and those that "Asian".

On the band wagon again..maybe

I haven't been a very good blogger for the entire time I've had this one here. I think I was much better at this in middle school and high school, back in the day when Xanga was the shit and MySpace became the place where a person could give her (his) face and person found online relevance & significance. I would write anything, and spew out frustrations and the littlest joys for anyone to see on the internet, with little regard for personal privacy and safety.

Anyhow... I just want to say that I plan on posting more on this. Books, thoughts and ideas.